Looking Good

Well...things are looking good. Fletcher is still cooking and I'm the same. The doctor told me on Monday that I could start trying a little more around the house. So...I did some laundry and made some pancakes for dinner last night. :) I had to sit down pretty often, but it got done. I go back to the doctor on Monday (the 21st)  and if things are the same I may be able to go back to work on Tuesday. That will put us at the 34 week mark. He is still healthy and growing, so if he comes...he comes. :)I am a little nervous about going back to work, but I know I'll have tons of support. My students are going to be pretty surprised about how big my stomach has gotten over the last four weeks. I mean think about how traumatizing it could be for a freshmen boy if his teacher's water breaks in class. :) But...at least he may have a cool story to tell his friends. Let's pray no one has to experience that.

Thanks to the help of my mom, dad, sister, and brother in law...our crib is up, furniture is arranged somewhat, and the walls are painted. That is all we really need to bring him home, right? We can make it cute later. :) We will be working on it a little bit at a time. I still can't do much for very long so it may be a slow process. (or I'll just watch other people do it for me) Thanks to my grandmother, Aunt, and Uncle we have a pack and play and car seat if all else fails. :)

I'm getting more excited everyday to meet our little boy. David and I were talking the other night about some things we want to teach our son. After David got through his usual sarcasm and ridiculous statements. (If you know him at all you know what I'm talking about). He said if I could leave him with anything it would be that God is love and treat people like they are more important than you are. These are such simple things that I don't always do a good job of. I'm so thankful I have a husband that chooses to not only teach these things but try everyday to live these things. We fail...yes...but having this baby has made us more aware of our attitude about the simple and complicated things in life. We have great examples in our family to follow, and hopefully we can do the same thing for our little guy.

We will get to meet our son.

Well...We are a week closer to meeting our Fletcher James Hunt, and we still want him to just hang out a few more weeks. I've been overwhelmed by the help of my husband and family in this entire process. I mean I knew I had a great family, and that I married well. But, they have been such a blessing in taking me to appointments, making sure I don't go crazy, and keeping my stress level down. Probably because they know how much I stress about little things. :) I don't know what I would do without them right now.

Just to prove how great David has been, I have been keeping a picture diary of all the yummy food he has been cooking me. He likes to cook, so that helps, but check out these yummy dishes.

 This isn't even all of them. Just the pictures I have. :)

Miranda has been busy picking out stuff for our nursery. I'm so glad she has good taste. Even if I wasn't on bed rest...I probably wouldn't be much help. :) She is much better at that than I am.

I went to the doctor this afternoon and things are the same.  Still contracting, but I haven't dilated any more and that is a good thing. We are really going to reevaluate everything next week and see what she thinks I can do???? Maybe the same, but I hope not.

I've become very aware about how God is teaching me to be patient and not to want things in this world. I was so worried that our baby might not come home to a cute nursery or clean house, and all this time God was teaching me it doesn't matter. He may not have the perfect "facebook picture" worthy room by the time he gets here, but it doesn't matter. He has a place to sleep and lots of love.

I love what David told me the other night. He said when I was in the hospital and we really didn't know what was going to happen that he had this overwhelming feeling that everything was going to be okay. He told me it doesn't matter. He just wanted to meet his son. And when I stress out I remind myself of that. David is so right....it doesn't matter...I will get to meet my son. :) That's pretty cool.

Don't try to explain the important things...

" Nothing important is completely explicable." Madeline L'Engle A Circle of Quiet

I came across this quote as I was searching our bookshelf for something to read. If you have never read Madeline L'Engle, I encourage you to. She has a great series called The Crosswick Journals that are almost like segments from her personal journals at different times in her life. ( I think she would have blogged :) As she struggled through marriage, life, children, and faith her writing is honest and humorous. I was introduced to them by David, as I am most good books, and they have become a staple in our house. When I read this quote over and over I thought it was very applicable to my experience today.

As I said in my earlier post, I want answers for things, and if I don't have the answers I look for ways to find them. That is not always a bad character flaw. But, when dealing with "the big stuff" and especially faith in "the big stuff, answers are not always what we need. We need to find our dependence on others and the desire to be lead by faith and not by sight. I'm really learning about that and working through it. For example, I watched while my husband cleaned the entire house this morning, and it almost killed me. Not because he wasn't doing it right or I thought I could do it better, but HE was doing it while I watched. I needed him to do it, since every time I move my stomach tightens and contractions start, but I don't want him to have to do everything. I have this overwhelming feeling of guilt already that he is doing so much, and I'm just sitting there watching....not critiquing. (I promise David ...okay maybe a little..you did dust the entire house with Clorox Green Works instead of dusting spray. :)  But it works, and that is what I realized. No matter what was being dusted with...it works and it is done. I'm really needing to depend on him for so many things right now, and he does everything without even showing a grimace of complaint. (at least to my face anyway).

The same is true with my faith. I want to know why this happened and what I can do to fix it. But...like Madeline L'Engle said, "Nothing important is completely explicable". This is one of those times in my life when I can't explain it away. There is no formula or equation for it to fit into. I need to learn to rely on others and God. Through this everything will work together for His good. So...here we go. I sit...I wait...I learn. I'm a teacher learning should be easy for me, right? Maybe I'm also learning how to be a good student. :)

I'm a blogger

So...I always thought I'll never blog. Nobody cares enough to read what is happening in my life or head. Then I was put on bed rest. I've gone a little crazy the past couple of weeks and thought...well people still probably don't care what is going on in my life or head, but I may need this little blog to get some things off my chest. I know a few people want to know...and it can be good medicine for me in the mean time. So instead of my journal...I will blog. :) Here we go:

I took a little tumble at my soccer tournament in Dallas on January 21. I was coaching or rather driving the bus and hauling girls around (not playing :) There were wonderful soccer moms who took great care of me and sat with me in the hospital while I was given medication to stop contractions I was having because of the fall. David came and picked me up and we headed home. I rested all weekend and felt a little funny, but I thought I was just sore from the fall. I really didn't do much at all. So school as normal on Monday, and then something was weird again. I called my doctor that morning and told her what I was feeling, and she met me at the hospital. They were calling it pre-term labor and started hooking me up to IVs almost immediately to stop contractions.  Everyone couldn't believe I drove myself to the hospital...I'm an idiot I know but I didn't know what was happening. I had no idea that my contractions were three minutes apart. I thought I was being a baby really. I got out on Thursday (Jan. 27) and was happy to be at home  rather than sitting in the hospital.

I've gone through several different emotions. I've been mad at myself, because I have overwhelming feelings that it is my fault. I've been relived and thankful that our baby boy has been healthy this entire time; he has just tried to come early. I've been angry with myself again. God and I even had it out in the hospital one night when I was confused and emotional all wrapped into one. In the midst of all this, I was reminded that it sucks...yes and it is okay to acknowledge that...but look at everything we have to be thankful for.

1. He is healthy
2. I have the most wonderful husband and family who have done so much for me.
3. I am surrounded by great friends and coworkers who have been praying for us and will help at the drop of the hat.
4. Did I mention our little boy is healthy.

There are people that are going through so much more than we are, and we should be grateful for what we have. If you know me...I'm a person that wants answers and solutions. If I don't have them I will figure out a way to get them. Well...this one may not be that easy. It is a waiting game, and I know God is going to teach me so much through this. Some things can't be explained, and I'm learning that is okay. It's not always my job to figure out the answers anyway.